Surviving a Long Distance Relationship

It is hard to have a long-distance relationship, in fact, very hard. A lot of people ask me how I make it work? It has been four years I’ve been married. Moreover, we have time difference due to us being in different continent. Our good nights and good mornings are very alternated. As we are both hot-tempered, it is very hard to have a good communication. We always get into misunderstandings and never able to show or say what we really feel. It’s awful. It was not helping our situation, it made it even worse.

My cousin who at that time (2010) was in the UK, was studying and I used to help him do his assignments. One day he introduced his friend to me (who is now my husband). We started chatting on MSN ( at that time, PC version of Whatsapp) As we were talking and so, he had told me that he liked one girl and that he was going to propose her and he had already told his mom about it. I started having doubts and a few weeks later, I asked him directly if I was the girl and his answer was YES!. At that time, I was not ready for anything and this long distance relationship was out of the way. I decided to block him on Facebook and MSN. It was January 2, 2011, somehow I received a message from him, I was shocked and I was nervous, wondering how could this happen, even though I blocked him.

I realized that he was the one and no matter what I did,  I had found the one for me. I start talking to him and I introduced him to my mom and she liked him as well.

Married in Sri Lanka in 2012, our plan was to sponsor and live in Canada, as every couple does. But, God had different plans for us.” The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.Proverbs 16:9”

STORM OF EMOTIONS…

Our sponsorship got refused. I was heartbroken, the gift I got for our first anniversary was a refusal letter of sponsorship from the Immigration. I cried and cried for weeks. I did not know how to handle it. Met with the lawyers, and it was hopeless because had to wait maybe two or three years before I could do anything. I hated going to the lawyer’s office.

Slowly, I recovered from the sorrow. I had many plans, many dreams, many happiness, it was all shattered in one single letter. My life had just changed. I didn’t give up, I got back on my feet and took the situation in control. I have always been a positive person, even if I fell down, I never gave up on hope and faith. I realized everything has its own timing and plans. I realized crying over my situation wasn’t going to change. I told my husband that we can’t change the situation but make something out of it. He didn’t agree, but no choice, right? So I booked my ticket to visit him.

Later on, I decided to go back to school, finish what I left and do what I always wanted to do. I visited him every year (very expensive) . I have my breakdowns, sometimes I cry in silent at night, thinking, worrying and cursing myself for being in a big mess, for being so helpless. Although I never gave up. I knew everything happens for a reason. Everything was pre-planned by God. I worked according to His plans now. In these four years, I am also proud to say that I have achieved many things. I am always thankful for God’s grace and mercy.

So how am I surviving and handling my situation? My only answer is : “I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13” Without the strength that He gives me I can’t. Moreover, I know who I am waiting for; is worth it. God gave me the best husband I could have asked for.

SHINING IN THE RAIN…

I am not blaming anyone for what happened to me because I know whatever happens; happens for a reason. Each failures and success teaches us a lessons. I have and still am learning the real meaning of love and especially the love and faith we have in God. He will never give us more than what we can handle.

Isaiah 40:31 But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Through good and bad, I never gave up. I visited him once in England while he was still there after the wedding. He then moved back to Sri Lanka. I went to visit him every year and made the best out of the worse. I never thought this will not work out.

Marriage is a relation made by God. Every union has their own meaning and every step we make leads into a better life.  I love my life and I love him no matter what.

I never regret marrying someone from a different country, because I am really happy with my husband. Every marriage has its flaws, it is in our hand to make the best out of it.

We are celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary in December 2017.

Suki Krishan

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